Now and Then.

Who the...?

Harendra Kapur.
Kyra Mathews.
Tejas Menon.

Ello all
It's summer time, and that means it's big movie time, and that further means it's big marketting promos time, which then eventually, usually, means it's awesome movie taglines time!
It was the summer of 2005 when I was first properly enamored by the art of the tagline. I was walking home through Metroplex, a large-ish cinema in Dubai, when I passed a poster for Rob Zombie's Devil's Rejects.
Since then, I have to admit, I haven't seen too many good taglines but I figured it's worth listing out some of the best tag lines I've ever found. I thought I'd be able to do a regular linear type list but the fact is it's too damn hard to pick so I'll break it down.

Naturally, some actors develop the kind of image that just begs for a tagline. Seagal, Norris, Schwarzenegger, Stallone, all had one "statement of awesomeness" too many if you ask me, but some of the awesome ones are:
SILENT RAGE: Science created him, now Chuck Norris must destroy him...(An obvious play on Frankenstein's 'Science created him but couldn't destroy him)
SHADOW MAN: Either you're with him...or you're dead! Classic Seagal. Funny thing is it's probably true.
And finally,
TERMINATOR II: He's back. Utter. Freaking. Class.
Since the 80s hayday for heroes, very few action films have really pulled off the tagline. The most disappointing was of course The Matrix trilogy. One man who did manage to bring back some of the awesome though, was a certain Mr. Tarantino and I must say his taglines for Kill Bill are most kick ass...
KILL BILL VOL. 1: Here comes the bride.
KILL BILL VOL. 2: Revenge is a dish best served cold.

There's plenty out there but only so few will ever really matter. I mean honestly, when you're up against Jaws II's "And you thought it was safe to get back in the water" the usual response would be to lie down and not even try. Here's my top 3...
GODZILLA: Size Does Matter
THE FLY: Be afraid, be very afraid...
And finally, my absolute favorite:
ALIEN: In space no one can hear you scream

DAZED and CONFUSED: It was the last day of school in 1976, a night they’d never forget… if only they could remember. A tagline far better than the movie but whatever.
BONNIE andCLYDE: They’re young… they’re in love… and they kill people.
DIRTY DANCING: The dancing’s over. Now it gets dirty
THE GRADUATE: This is Benjamin. He's a little worried about his future.
BUTCH CASSIDY and the SUNDANCE KID: Not that it matters, but most of it is true.
And finally, trumpets and all bow down for
STAR WARS: A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away…

For me, a tag line that talks to me is always awesome. It involves me and it feels like the producer's got his arm on my shoulder talking to me...
Kind of like the tagline for The Hoax which read 'Based on true events. Would we lie to you?'
Well according to the man it's based on they did, but I digress.
SHAUN of the DEAD: A romantic comedy...with zombies
JOHNNY ENGLISH: He knows no fear, he knows no danger, he knows nothing!
MONTY PYTHON and the HOLY GRAIL: Makes Ben Hur look like an epic
THIS IS SPINAL TAP: Does for rock and roll what "The Sound of Music" did for hills. ( Got to love those Brits)

I've got to say, Judd Apatow and his gang of miscreants can do NO wrong. When it comes to tag lines, they continue the theme with some freaking awesome innuendo.
My favorites are as follows:
TALADEGA NIGHTS: The story of a man who could only count to #1
WALK HARD: THE STORY of DEWEY COX: Life made him tough. Love made him strong. Music made him hard
And last of all, my absolute favorite tag line...
ANCHORMAN: His news is bigger than your news

If there's any good ones I've left out please feel free to let us know in the comments. Let's hope for some more good tag lines and til next time, just remember the immortal words of Speedman from Scorcher VI
"...who left the freezer open?"

2 responses to "The Best Movie Taglines ever"

  1. Your Blog is like an addictive Tv show or like... i check in from time to time...and there is always a new post... i like i like~!
    And Dazed and Confused is an awesome movie... i actually found it hilarious... watch it nonsoberish.

    Why so serious? - dark knight

    No actual Europeans were harmed in the making of this film. - EUROTRIP

    The mission is a man - saving private ryan

    For three men, the civil war wasn’t hell. It was practice! - The good, the bad and the ugly


  2. Ahaha. I love the Eurotrip one.
    When I saw Dazed and Confused I wasn't nearly sober and I just wasn't too amused. I loved a lot of it, specially the bits about George Washington's weed fields! But yea I don't know.
    Anyway thank you for the comment. It's been getting lonely here at the.

    Today's word: thropi!


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